*Originally published on September 27, 2018
I’m not a person who welcomes change. In fact, more often than not I run from it. The thought of breaking out of my comfort zone and routine has always terrified me. I struggle with anxiety as it is, and the sheer thought of making a drastic change in my life would send me down a spiral of doom. Oddly enough, I’ve never been worried about trying new things as an actor; in fact, breaking into new territory excites me in that area. However, I recently took a big leap of faith, and I thought I would share a little bit about it.
One of the most common things I think we all hear growing up is about how change is good, and ultimately, inevitable. I used to think I could avoid change by having everything all figured out by the time I was 18. Let me tell you, I was very much mistaken. As a young adult, I was desperate to get out on my own, and made the drastic change from Chandler, Arizona to Flagstaff to study Theatre Performance at NAU. 3 ½ years later, I sat at my graduation ceremony thinking, “This was the best decision I’ve ever made!” I needed to be on my own, to show myself I could do it. I needed to grow and learn (and I certainly did that.)
I think that feeling is what drove me to take my latest leap of faith. For the last 6 months, I’d been itching to make a career change. Deciding to change jobs is one thing, but sending in resumes and waiting? That’s the brutal part. It took months before I heard anything. Finally, I got an interview, and I was offered the job within the day! To be honest, I really didn’t think it was going to happen. When it did, it really hit me that in a matter of weeks I’d be starting a new job.
Some people may say things like, “It’s just a job” or “That’s really not a big deal.” However, some of my coworkers had known me since I was 16 years old. It was my first “big girl” job, so the idea of leaving was a hard pill to swallow. The more I thought about it, the more I knew I was feeling stuck, and needed to make a change to move forward in my life. I’ve always been a goal-oriented person, and anyone who knows me knows they are big goals. At the end of the day, that’s where my focus needs to be.
Do I miss my coworkers terribly? Absolutely. However, I know they wanted to see me spread my wings just as much as I was itching to. And now, having completed my training, and having been at my new job for about a month, I can take a step back and say, “I did it!” I promise you, there is no greater feeling than jumping into the fear and uncertainty, and coming out on the other side. I challenge you to take that leap of faith. I promise you the end result is absolutely worth it.
(My sweet going-away gift, which I wear daily)